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Interview Transcription
Morris: Welcome to CreateGrowProfit: Coaching Stories, I am Morris from creategrowprofit.com and today I’m speaking to Lori Beard. Lori helps people become their best friend instead of their biggest enemy. Lori thank you so much for being here today. Where are you calling in from?
Lori: I am calling in from Dallas Texas in the US. How are you, Morris? Thanks for having me.
Morris: Thank you for being here today. I’m great. Thank you so much. The first question always on the show is how did you become a coach and especially when was the first time you officially called yourself a coach?
Lori: Okay do we have three hours? No, I’m just kidding. Yeah, so I was the fourth of four children. I was the youngest the number four and I was raised by a group of amazing women. So my mother was the breadwinner figure and my grandma stayed home.
She agreed on helping my mom, taking care of us and I saw how these amazing women were strong and needed to survive and created this little community to support each other. I don’t know, since then I’ve been observing human behavior and taking mental notes right?
Also my grandma was so hungry for her teachings you know how some adults are they just want to lecture you and sometimes we roll our eyes and want to look the other way but no, for me, I wanted her wisdom and I was so thirsty and hungry for her wisdom. I always say she was my first coach, my dear grandma.
And my mom was my example of hard work and grit and getting herself out there to win it, she was fighting for us right as a single mom, or divorce. They got divorced when I was born. And because of this divorce, I always grew up with this complex like why was it that my parents didn’t get together or fought to stay together?
That’s how I was my worst inner critic. I was my worst enemy thinking that I was, I had some damage or I was, I had a defect or something because then I associated my parent’s divorce with rejection or with me. I took it very personal when of course, I don’t know what was happening in their lives and as adults they made that decision but fast forward, I wanted to be a mom and I got married and I gave birth and raised eight children and I was so blessed to stay at home like I said, my mom wasn’t able to stay home.
But I really loved having that grandma there present and I think when my child number 8 went to school I’m like “what am I going to do now?” That’s when this burning desire to should do something else or contribute something more to the community other than with my motherhood and my children. That’s when that desire started or woke in me and that’s how I found out about an amazing coaching program and that’s when everything started.
Morris: Wow! I mean as we spoke a little bit before, we hit record here. I still can’t believe how many children you have and grandchildren too, you said because you look as I said you look so fresh, you know?
Lori: Oh that’s so sweet! Thank you.
Morris: And you even introduced yourself as a grandma, which is unbelievable?
Lori: Yeah depending on when you’re listening to this. In September of 2024, I’m going to have my grandbaby number six.
Morris: Big, big family so that’s a lot of fun.
Lori: Yeah.
Morris: When would you say was the first time you called yourself a coach? Do you remember that time or was it a seamless transition?
Lori: Yeah. I know I left that part of the question unanswered. I think with the coaching program and everything that I was learning and absorbing, remember from my grandma’s teachings? I was always like so eager to learn and as I took classes, learning about human behavior psychology classes and things like that I was like oh so intrigued and I think Morris, like whenever we got homework to deal with ourselves like to have the self-discoveries, that is when I started considering myself a coach.
Because I kind of also became my first client and I think back to 2017-2018, when I was going through all these self-discoveries, crying like what? I need to answer to what. I need to dig within me and come up with an answer for this deep question that nobody has ever asked me you know with our coaching.
You know how powerful questions are and when we ask these deep questions to our clients that’s when I’m like I have heard so many times no one’s ever asked me that question before. I never thought of that before that way. I never looked at that this way and that’s what was happening to me when I was just participating on the studies, being a very engaged and active student. Then I realized I was becoming my own first client so I don’t know if that answers.
Morris: No no totally no it’s a I think a lot of coaches experience that where and I think that is kind of coaching. We grow first and that allows us to help others grow through a similar transition or change.
Lori: Absolutely and then we had homework to coach each other as peers, other students, and then when those coaches would ask us questions or when I would ask those them or coaches to be, “Oh my goodness that was so good, so helpful to help each other”. As co-students, we don’t call each other co-workers but co-students or classmates and it was so great to go through those experiences of awakening and even breakthroughs with some answers that we needed to come up with not come up with because we were making them up is just like real self-realization and that self-awareness is just pivotal in our own change and transformation.
Morris: Do you remember some of the questions? Because you mentioned like so many times you hear people react with I’ve never been asked that question? Do you have a catalog of questions that provokes this response or is it individual?
Lori: It is very individual but it’s a skill we learn and there’s a book and depending on where your audience is from they will appreciate I have it in various languages in Spanish or Power Questions. And this is a very insightful book pre-AI, right? We are so conditioned and so used to now. We’re so spoiled now with AI that you can also do that and whatever. The resource is out there for you to come up with very insightful questions for you to have this amazing thought-provoking session with a client.
Not just to let pass the time. Time passes by during the session just for that client to tap into their inner answers and to answer your question I do have a bank of questions like Tell me more why do you think that, how is that real for you right now, is that your worst enemy’s voice talking to you or is that the voice of you having hope for yourself or who’s inflicting that is it self-inflicted or is it other voices that you were used to listening to.
So those are my questions that I have go to questions that are very good and effective but like you said it’s also very personal. I have a specific client right now wanting to improve in certain skills because my intake forms and if you’re listening to this and you’re a brand new coach, that intake form if it’s designed for you to create a blueprint to better help that client, I encourage you to to just research.
And there’s many templates out there online. Create or try to find an intake form that will help you, already understand where is it what, where is your client’s pains, where is your clients needs and wants and desires. From that intake form, I already knew how is my discovery call first. Then intake form right and then you understand where your client wants to go and then you ask AI if you’re using AI. A set of questions that will help this client understand himself better and guide them to where they want to go .
Morris: First of all thank you for sharing your questions, they are very powerful and what you’ve just shared here too is very interesting regarding the intake forms. Do you have some tips on how to design or structure such an intake form?
Lori: Yes like I said it’s just the basic information at the beginning and then you know what are the things you want more help with, which I have like little checkboxes like sleep sleepless night, restlessness, nervousness, self-improvement, confidence. I have certain areas that I want to know where they feel they are lacking skills or ability and courage or whatever it is. And then I ask, picture yourself because of my clinical hypnosis component I asked them what are your favorite places you like to be.
Because if during the session, we are talking about something that’s triggering some bad memories and things like that then I have that in my little toolbox to try to help my clients calm down and imagine themselves in this beautiful place. Okay, so if I already know my client loves to be at the beach or in a specific place in the world, I’m like, “hey just calm down, just take a deep breath, imagine yourself at this place,” then you know I have that right in my toolbx or tool belt.
And I also want to ask the client what are their three main goals in life. Okay, depending on where they are in life, now I have that as a guide. Okay, this is where this person wants to be so how can I help my client get there? Okay if that’s too ambitious you know, you cater it to one or two of those goals or ask them which of those three goals you know is the most important to acquire in that amount of sessions they sign up for or program they sign up for.
But it’s very important to design an intake form that will give you as much information as you need to make those sessions very intentional meaningful and productive for the client and for yourself as a coach.
Morris: Yeah I like how structured you are, Lori. Thank you for sharing that.
Lori: Oh you’re welcome! You’re welcome and that’s separate from an agreement. I don’t know if also the coaches out there need to hear that. Other than the intake form which is for you to understand the client more, the agreement is very important too.
Agreeing on terms and conditions, on punctuality for the appointments, on if there’s a no-show, then it’s like it’s prepaid and it’s like a no-show. And it’s like I have my expertise here but my coaching doesn’t do anything else that I’m not promising you like financial advice, legal advice. I’m not gonna do that so the person signs up also an agreement so that’s also very important.
Morris: Yes that’s true. Yeah making sure expectations are clear. Not just what you’re working on with your client but also the legal stuff so not like legal legal but I think you know what I mean.
Lori: It’s just an agreement one. Once upon a time our word was enough but nowadays we need a little bit more of those small prints you know and things like that, the style of coaching. Is it democratic? Is it more authoritative like do you want me to be kind of like a football coach like spitting in your face you know some people said no that doesn’t? That will shut me down that I don’t work that way and they say no I want you to kind of be happy medium.
Because that’s why we’re there for right? We’re there for them to support them and depending on the style they want from us that’s what we need to deliver. So all all kinds of things you can put in that agreement form too.
Morris: And what is it the kind of coaching you do today and what kind of people do you work with today?
Lori: I am eager to work with people that want transformation and change. Most likely I attract people who are going through or undergoing hidden grief meaning they don’t even know that that’s a thing but they’re so blocked due to something that has happened in the past. That they cannot move forward and they’re blocked. They have limiting beliefs or thought processes that don’t allow them to think, I can do this. I’m wonderful enough that I can do this and I can pass through my fears or through my limitations.
Again whether they are self-inflicted or inflicted by some voices of authority from their past, grown-ups teachers whatever it is or a loved one in a romantic relationship, you’re never going to be good enough, you’re never going to be an artist, you’re never going to be a good enough man or husband or whatever, and if they’re done like they’re like there must be something else in life, I want to change I want to get over this.
Those are the people who seek me. I know this is a very important podcast that you have and I know you’re a marketing expert Morris but I also believe that doing all those things social media presence, good marketing, good funnels, is what it where the game is.
At the same time Morris I have experience too and I have my little lighthouse philosophy and my lighthouse philosophy is that whe I’m going to have my social media presence, I’m going to have my good website that describes my information who I am, what is it that I do and who is it that I’m looking to work with but I believe that if we are irradiating our light, all the ships will get to the firehouse.
We’ll get to safe to port and will find me because they’re looking for me, Lori Beard or they’re looking for you, Morris Grand. And they want what you’re offering and that is who I have been very successful with people that find me because they are so tired of being tired that they check out my information. They’re like this is what I want, I get it, I get what is it that she may help me with and I want it and boom, there’s a client.
Morris: Yeah when it’s a good match it’s effortless right?
Lori: Absolutely and what we’re seeking is seeking us. So when the student’s ready the teacher shows up and it’s just like the Law of Attraction if you believe in that and I believe in it.
Morris: Yeah no, I resonate with that too you know? You mentioned the marketing and the marketing game and I think about that a lot with people that I work with because marketing is not really complicated it’s like you know it’s not like when you’re a doctor or a lawyer, you need a degree and you become certified but you don’t become a certified marketer. Anyone can be a marketer. It’s not that hard but the thing is doing it, is difficult because of many personal blocks, mental blocks.
And that’s why I think the work that you do is so important because if you don’t believe in yourself or you don’t believe in your message or you hate yourself on camera or how you look in pictures whatever, then you’re not doing marketing.
Lori: Exactly. That’s where when you’re your worst enemy and it’s so self-conscious about it not being perfect it whatever it is the video, the podcast episode, the interview, you need to show up. You need to show up and that’s the marketing. You need to show up, be yourself and love what you do and for you to be able to transmit that through the lenses, through the screen and for people to get to think that’s what I need.
So I think that as coaches, we need to get ourselves out there and I invite you, and some people like invitations some people like challenges. I challenge you, I invite you whatever resonates with you to try it to either if you don’t like to be in camera, remember back in the day when in-person activities and meetups and networking groups existed. Try to find a networking group, shake hands with people and tell them very easily what is it that you do.
Like, Morris asked me at the beginning of the show at the interview how is it that you want me to introduce you, and I’m like well I help individuals to become their best self, their best version of themselves by becoming their best friend and ally. And I’m like oh I like that! So if you want to shake people’s hand say hey this is what I do this is what I do simple. Simple. Many of us like to complicated and sound smart and all that and people will go whoa I don’t understand. I still don’t know and that’s happened to me.
That’s happened to me, Morris, when I’m not very clear with what I do or who is it that I want to work with or what is it that I want to offer the world, it causes confusion. I don’t understand what is it that you do, Lori. I’m like okay I don’t blame you I don’t understand what I do either but the more I tap into the message I want to bring out it’s, the easier and easier.
Morris: I like that you take it with humor though like that. That’s good!.
Lori: I know we have to make fun of ourselves and it’s been quite a fun journey for me.
Morris: Yeah I think especially online like people are a little afraid of doing that because there is this perceived pressure to look like an expert and so in that world, it’s even more refreshing if someone can you know make a little fun of themselves or be light-hearted about any confusion that they create.
But what I really loved was how you said to show up and love what you do. I think that is very very powerful. I like how you summarize that I’m going to use that in the future if it’s okay with you.
Lori: Absolutely Morris! So you and I have talked a little bit about all the things we like to do, we’ve done or we’re doing and at some point, I was making like a 100% profit on something that I was doing that I’m very passionate about but the burning desire is not like a big fire right?
It’s just, I like to do this but I like to do this other thing and which is coaching. And this project was helping me fund my brick-and-mortar office at the time and I don’t have a brick and- mortar office, I work like this now or in nature walks with my clients which is amazing and I’m like why am is it that I’m making a 100% profit here and it’s so lucrative like I’m making money here effortlessly.
And I’m still fighting for this other thing and it’s a little bit harder then I just did the thing that I teach my clients to do like be quiet and to tap into my inner self and inner greatest answers and wisdom. It’s like Lori because your heart is not fully there, your heart is here and that’s why you’re pursuing this even though it’s a little bit harder. Because that is where your fire is and your love and you know I would do this without pay but I’ve learned that’s hard too.
But when you know that what you’re doing doesn’t feel like work and that is just the best combination. I was doing that because I needed it right and it was creating a profit but that coaching was where my heart is and where my heart was and still is because I love to see the transformation in my clients. I love that after one session they have already experienced some kind of difference and some kind of difference in their state, emotional state, in their energy or their vision for life and their hope for life so that is where my passion is.
Morris: We need to talk about that more because I saw on your website that you have a 7R system and you use clinical hypnosis but before we get into that, you know since you mentioned your transition from your previous business to the coaching business, how did you you get your first batch of clients? How did you start your practice?
Lori: Like I said up the Lighthouse factor is like that. I probably had made my first posts that I took at like a business class and all that too right?Tthey wanted us to get clients and things no create your Facebook page and now record yourself. Oh my goodness it was so hard so my first client was off of Facebook. One person that thought that I was his answer.
It was an amazing experience. An electrician and was competing with another electrician and I helped him realize that he didn’t need to compete with somebody else. He needed to compete with himself and oh my goodness. All the goals with that intake form were fulfilled and he was able to increase his income etc but started with himself.
So to answer yes. It was through one of my first postings on Facebook first video post. People want to understand who you are they want to see you, they want to hear your voice your inflection, they want to see your facial features and maybe I have repelled people with that or maybe I have attracted people with that and that’s what we want. So that’s why we need to get ourselves out there.
Morris: I have to say I hear that very rarely most of the coaches tell me stories of how they started in their network but this is a rare case where you posted on social media online and got your first client like that. I think that speaks volumes to your ability to show up on social media.
Lori: Oh absolutely! Absolutely, yes people want to learn who you are. They want to like you and trust you and I had seen that with a coach. I’m not sure if you know who she is. She’s in the United States her name is Marie Forleo, amazing coach so I would see tons of her videos. This was when life coaching was a crazy thing or looked down upon or she was one of the first life coaches in the United States.
Marie Forleo, look her up, she’s amazing, she’s a doll. And I would see her example and I would see how everything was against her. She was too young to be a life coach, what is a life coach you know and she didn’t care. She beat all the odds and she was so confident about herself so I wanted to be that.
I didn’t know it at the time but then when I started being challenged or invited to record my own videos and all that I’m like I’ve enjoyed this about Marie Forleo. If I have enjoyed it, I need to do it also and step up. I want to ask your audience out there.
Imagine if your best singer, your best athlete, your best team, your best actor will be shying and hiding under their bed and saying no I don’t want to do that because I don’t trust myself. You wouldn’t have enjoyed a good game, a good concert, good music because they would be suppressing that and not showing up.
Imagine if all of those people that you enjoy and give you happiness in life or faith in life, for me is Christian Rock, imagine if those lyrics would not be out there because they were so scared about, “Oh no this is not a good enough song”, we would not be enjoying a lot of things in life. So people are there waiting for you. People want what you have. Just get yourself out there.
Morris: That is beautifully said, Lori. That’s a good mindset, that’s a good reminder to start the day with hope. Anyone listening to this in the morning, I hope this, you know, sets the mind for the rest of the day. Lori, let’s talk about your coaching process too, how does your 7R methodology work and how, where does clinical hypnosis come into your methodology?
Lori: Wonderful. Wonderful question. Before I share my step fast forward or seven RS method, I want to share a little bit of my three pillars which is the framework. The framework is believe. Believe that you can change, you can transform, begin. Begin doing those things that are going to help you with the change for you to become and I don’t know about you I haven’t gotten to that destination yet Morris, I am becoming you know I have become a better person, a better Coach and it’s a lifelong journey.
So those pillars are the ones I work with, believing in yourself beginning or believing in your coach at least, if you don’t believe in yourself yet and then beginning to do those things which takes action and to become the best version of yourself, become your best friend and ally and then that’s when my seven Rs method or Steadfast forward method can come in.
Because we’re creatures of habit and we’re so marked with our past, I even don’t want to use the word trauma but yes traumas of life. I share with people seven R which are in my book, I’m self-published. You can find it on Amazon my book is removing emotional burdens. That is very important because that is one of the reasons why you have those limiting beliefs because you’re carrying so much emotional garbage or weight on your shoulders that you need to remove them say no more.
Resolving those internal conflicts and my example is me having felt so ashamed or bad about myself that I was not enough so I needed to remove those emotional burdens about myself to resolve the internal conflicts. Like I’m not responsible about my parents’ decisions right and then to release the negativity, to reframe those sabotaging perceptions.
Reframe them like putting them in a new frame like okay I don’t understand what my parents what was happening with my parents but I am wonderful enough. I am great enough and I’m not responsible for that. It’s like putting it in a new frame of mind and replacing it with positivity. I’m awesome. I’m beautiful. I’m courageous. I’m confident.
And to restore meaningful relationships and that relationship is with divinity, deity and yourself and in my situation with my dad like, “Lori, stop, he is who he is, he made his choices” I need to restore. If this is meaningful for me, it’s not going to interrupt my life or be destructive. It’s okay for us to repair those relationships or restore them to then rewrite our stories and that’s my seven RS.
You can rewind this episode a little bit so you can write it down. But those are my seven RS that will help you improve life and then they’re ongoing because we’re going to live life and stuff is going to happen. New stuff is going to happen to us so when we revisit those seven Rs, then we can live a life of joy and fulfillment. We didn’t start the story of our lives but we can rewrite or write the ending, the final chapters of our life. We can design them, by design if we create our blueprint, we’re going to have a better ending.
Morris: Again, I really like how structured you are, Lori, but at the same time you are very intuitive within you know your structure. I think that’s amazing coaching.
Lori: Thank you. Thank you.
Morris: And what about your clinical hypnosis? I’m curious when you use that.
Lori: Yeah so clinical hypnosis is just a beautiful modality that allows me as a practitioner to tap into people’s subconscious mind whether it is to recalibrate how the person thinks or their thought processes or to, I don’t like to use the word reprogram but recalibrating kind of resonates better with me.
So that they again become their best friend. When somebody is thinking because it was self-inflicted out of an assumption or interpretation, somebody told me my dad always told me to use your head, use your head, use your head in a very horrible tone of voice etc.
What that person was hearing was you’re dumb right? So those are our own assumptions and conclusions that we take out of somebody’s tone, somebody saying whether they’re right or wrong. And then instead of that person thinking all the time I need to use my head because I’m dumb, then if that person has those feelings or that record playing all the time repeating and repeating then if that’s the thing,”Okay. I’m dumb. I’m not good enough.” My client and myself, we come up to an agreement on what is it that we want to release, remove or resolve during that session.
So that I can help the person guide them through a metaphorical experience or literal depending on how the client receives better. We can go through an experience where I help the client to relax so that they are open to receive their subconscious mind so that we can recalibrate those thoughts, those limiting beliefs by resolving them, releasing them and it’s so amazing how the subconscious mind knows how to do it on its own with my guidance and my voice and then just I help that client to come back, to be alert and the person comes back as a new person.
I see it in their countenance. I see it in their emotional state in their energy and even in their body. How they stand, how they walk, it’s just an amazing experience. So words are very important, Morris. And I have a whole keynote talk and presentation on words and words is what I use to help the clients that conscious level.
Morris: Is that keynote available online to watch? Can I link to it below the episode?
Lori: Oh it’s a keynote that I do have done in Live Events I don’t have.
Morris: Oh okay. Okay so all right so okay if people want to hear that they got to hire you.
Lori: They have to hire me or invite me to their podcast to just talk about that. Yeah it’s just basic, if I tell you don’t think of a pink elephant what’s your mind going to do?
Morris: Yeah the Pink Elephant is right there.
Lori: Right? So that’s the basic takeaway from the keynote is just say, “Hey if I want you to think of a gray elephant or a purple elephant, I’m going to ask you to think of a purple elephant”. And that’s how the mind reprograms for negativity. Teachers in school don’t forget, the homework, the conscious mind is so gullible that it’s going to think forget.
Morris: Yeah.
Lori: And instead of remembering, I see so many billboards. I see a lot of marketing information with words that are not going to help. That do at this service instead of helping get people or hook people into.
Morris: Lori, I think it’s fascinating what you do. Where can people find you listening to this? And which links do I put below the episode?
Lori: My webpage steadfastforward.com and just Lori steadfastforward.com if you want to talk to me or email me. But it’s very simple I’m all over Facebook, and Instagram. It’s Lori Beard so you can see what I have. I also, Morris, which we’re excited that you’re coming to our podcast with my business partner, Unlocking Freedom in Nature is what also where you can see me and it’s there’s a channel on YouTube where you can see me in interviewing a lot of experts and professionals in their story of how they are leveraging from art and nature to be happy but yeah this was a great experience thanks for having me Morris and I’m here for you.
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